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My Dad's Gone Away

 

My Dad’s Gone Away by Andrew Krakouer and Jaqueline Dinan, Illustrated by Paul Seden, Magabala Books $27.99 hb

 

Andrew Krakouer is best remembered as an AFL footballer. He played more than 100 games with Richmond between 2001 and 2007. Between 2010 and 2013, he played a further 35 games with Collingwood. Between those two commitments he spent sixteen months in jail. His four children were young at the time.

It’s a sad irony that Andrew’s own father, Jimmy, also spent time in jail when Andrew was a child. Andrew recalls that time vividly and the painful sense of an absence in his life.

This is not the place to comment on the nature of either Jimmy or Andrew’s offending, except perhaps to observe that the children of people who have served time in jail are more likely than the rest of us to end up there themselves. More than a fifth of those in custody have had parents who also served time.

Andrew Krakouer and Jaqueline Dinan have published a beautiful book for children about this experience. My Dad’s Gone Away will help any young person faced with the prospect of visiting mum, dad or any close adult in jail. It is graceful and gentle but also honest. It is also a book that will help any young person who might like to consider what some other people their age might be going through. To state the unseen obvious, it is not a child’s fault that a parent is in jail. Yet they are punished as well, and the trauma can be long lasting.

We are not talking about a small number of people. Although it is difficult to gather precise information, estimates suggest that about 77,000 Australian children have been affected by having parents in jail. The majority of these parents are fathers. Men comprise 92 per cent of the prison population. Half of them are aged in their 30s, a peak time for parenthood.

This experience is by no means totally absent from the Australian imagination. Trent Dalton’s runaway best seller, Boy Swallows Universe, set in Brisbane in 1983, enabled readers, and viewers of the subsequent Netflix series, to fall in love with young Eli Bell. Eli’s father has moved away, his stepfather is on the wrong side of the law, his brother doesn’t speak, and his mother is in jail. In a memorable and tragi-comic sequence, Eli breaks into jail to visit his mother. Despite everything he hears, he never loses faith in her. Trent Dalton’s style is Dickensian, which is no criticism. The pain in his books is real but there is a bit of rose-coloured glass between him and many of his characters, especially kids. He uses a spoon full of sugar to make the medicine go down. I, for one, appreciate the tenderness of his stories.

My Dad’s Gone Away is different in many respects, not just because it is targeted at younger readers. It shares an Indigenous perspective Andrew Krakouer is a Nyoongar and Yamatji man. The illustrator, Paul Seden, whose work is a wonderful feature of the book, comes from the Wuthathi and Muralag people of North Queensland. Jaqueline Dinan herself has been a foster carer who looked after many children while a parent was in jail. She and her family in Melbourne hosted an Indigenous teenager from a traditional community in the Northern Territory while he was in high school. She is a strong ally and deeply invested in the process of reconciliation.

This perspective is powerful because Indigenous Australians are wildly overrepresented in our prisons. First Nations people comprise 3 per cent of our overall population but 30 per cent of the prison population. Moreover, almost half of our Indigenous prisoners have dependant children.

So how do Andrew Krakouer, Jaqueline Dinan and Paul Seden handle this complex situation?

The storyteller is Tarah, a young girl whose name is made up of the initials of the names of Andrew’s four children. She wonders where her father has gone. Her mother knows that truth is often tough, but dishonesty is far less kind. ‘Your dad has gone to prison.’

Tarah asks if her father has done something wrong. Again, the book doesn’t hide behind euphemisms. ‘Yes, Tarah. Dad has to serve time in prison as punishment.’

Tarah’s mother won’t allow her daughter to be disabled by the experience. On a long drive for a prison visit, she asks Tarah to think about how she can be more responsible at home. The story then shows us the process of going through security, being searched, encountering sniffer dogs and so on. But soon her dad appears, and they have a heartfelt reunion. As mum and dad talk privately together, Tarah makes friends with a boy, Johnny, who is also visiting his dad. That friendship will endure.

My Dad’s Gone Away takes a situation of potential isolation and uses it to celebrate human connection on every level. The result is an uplifting and healing encounter with one of our hidden wounds.

 

 


Michael McGirr is the mission facilitator of Caritas Australia 

Main image: Magabala Books, Instagram

Topic tags: Michael McGirr

 

 

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