I'm from one of those Catholic families that causes heartburn among those concerned with the future of the church in increasingly secular Australia.
By the mid-90s in suburban Canberra, four children was enough to be considered a 'big Catholic' family. If you needed a child to do a reading or if children's Mass was a baby doll short, a Cook could be reliably called upon to avert crisis. But even then it was clear, we were the type of family who would only be back for major holidays (if that) after the youngest had finished their sacraments.
Maybe it's because, by virtue of birth order, I spent far more Sundays in pews than my siblings did that I'm the only one self-identifying as Catholic. The church has always meant more about family than religion to me — sure, my grandmother's grandmother did it all in Latin, but isn't it kind of cool that we went through the same motions? — and I thought it always would. But then I got lucky: I moved to the world's most populous Muslim country.
Indonesia's approach to religion certainly has its problems. Intolerance has been a major issue in recent years, particularly following the attacks on former Jakarta governor Basuki 'Ahok' Tjahaja Purnama and his subsequent jailing on blasphemy charges.
The political scandal was widely seen as some factions of the city's Muslim majority targeting the ex-governor for his double minority status — ethnically Chinese and identifying as Christian. Demonstrations saw thousands of hardline Islamists take to the streets and demand the governor's jailing, and even death, during the gubernatorial election campaign at the start of last year — a scary throwback to other incidents when minorities were targeted during social upheaval.
But largely, my own experience in a tiny sliver of one of the world's messiest megacities has been one of tolerance, curiosity, and religion as a middle ground between strangers from different cultures. This, of course, comes with a massive caveat that I belong to one of six religions recognised by Indonesia. For Jewish friends, or indeed Indonesian nationals who adhere to Indigenous religions or are minorities within major religions, it is a different story entirely.
Back home, talking religion can feel like a minefield. It's better to stay quiet — remember to Google that later — than embarrass yourself or cause offence. Confessing to my own religious beliefs beyond 'I went to Catholic school' has repeatedly opened