Good parents don't make gender stereotypical choices

08 December 2014

Among silly season news stories in the media this year is the trivialising treatment of Greens Senator Larissa Waters' deadly serious call for parents to avoid buying Christmas toys that gender stereotype their children.

She quotes a No Gender December campaign coordinator's declaration that 'women mow lawns and men push prams, but while we've moved on, many toy companies haven't'. Waters says apparently harmless child gender stereotypes can adversely affect self-perception and career aspirations, and even end in domestic violence that echoes the bullying many have experienced as children.

Liberal Senator Cory Bernardi heard about the media release and thought his fellow senator had 'consumed too much Christmas eggnog'. He said: 'To say you're giving a boy a truck or a hammer is somehow leading to domestic violence and gender pay gaps is simply bizarre'. He had in mind the so-called 'gender wars' of the 1970s, rather than all the work that has been done to identify the causes of young people committing suicide.

Meanwhile there was a mixed message from the Prime Minister, who sniggered and joked about political correctness as he uttered the cliche 'let boys be boys, let girls be girls'. But then he was spot on when he went on to declare: 'Above all else, let parents do what they think is in the best interests of their children.'

Of course all devoted parents work hard to make sure their children are 'happy little Vegemites'. Mostly, thoughtful choice of appropriately gendered toys, clothing and other accoutrements, helps to give children a sense of psychological fulfilment. These things often have them feeling one with their environment and not on its margins.

Parents put love before dogma in supporting their children to come to terms with who they are with respect to gender. Dogma refers to social norms and expectations in the various sectors of society. Tony Abbott's utterance 'Let boys be boys, let girls be girls – that's always been my philosophy' is an expression of dogma. It is, to turn his slur on himself, politically correct.

Dogma is part of a deductive process that does real harm to people who don't measure up to expectations. Dogma judges and excludes them. They feel alienated from family and various social groups and units of society and develop a sense that their life is unworthy. A logical consequence of that is that they can be driven to thoughts of suicide.

The Church is often perceived to

AUSTRALIA

Good parents don't make gender stereotypical choices

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