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ARTS AND CULTURE

Inventing terror

  • 07 October 2008

Undertow

It's Anzac Day and the country is asleep. Somebody has welded a magpie to a letter box. It throws me, momentarily, as the small gatherings in towns along the Western Plains.   A girl sitting in a computer class asks what is the war on terror? Wikipedia provides links to Bin Laden, Al Qaeda, Bush, September 11, yet there isn't a clear explanation. The neutrality of the article is disputed. Jean Duverney founded Cressy in 1837 This much can't be disputed. A display map nailed to the outside of a toilet block wall urges me to discover the Western Plains. Bush's promise isn't as clear as 2001. I remember the newspaper sub-headings — 'war on terror', each page apportioning blame, every fridge around the country doing its bit.   Still, the Woady Yaloak inches between reeds. Around a sweeping bend, stands of eucalypts lean in. After days of relentless newspaper saturation it comes down to this — wreaths arrayed around cenotaphs, a circle of men nursing stubbies outside a fire-station, flags half-mast front of weatherboard halls. Modest ceremonies for the men who jumped to enlist, to escape, their names chiselled into stone, remnants of an attitude, a value. The frame of an abandoned service station a scattering of sheds, a converted school, yet the paddocks were always a memory field — Fighting Waterholes, Murdering Gully, car wrecks piled up behind farmhouses, Metricon homes plonked in treeless bogs. The girl will invent something about terrorism. It will become an attitude. Real Nothing is as real as scraping squashed sultanas from the kitchen's polished floorboards, as picking up children's toys with the radio on, as returning lost bears to the collection of soft toys and remembering the smell of babies, as making plans to write but realising nappy pants need to be soaked, as diverting children's fights while discovering more toys under the couch, as being unable to shower, venture outside hours slipping by like astronauts floating off into space, as giving your time to the dishes your children's questions, as listening to their imaginary friends for intellectual stimulation, as the unopened mail, smeared avocado on the floor, as the sense there are other people living beyond the finger marks on the glass sliding door, your life advancing in the inches you hadn't bargained for, your glistening trail that sticks. Grand Final Man Arms outstretched, wavering a misguided messiah who missed the finals with a drop in form. It's his roar that gets me as I try to outrun him across the bare patches of the oval, be the first to clap the backs of my heroes who smile, then walk away from me.   His voice comes from within the ground no words, just an unstructured bellow that unsettles you, unnerving as elation should be. And yet, the same guttural cry I imagine after the loss of